This peculiar game is similar in many ways to Ireland's national game, Gaelic Football, and indeed it is from this sport that Aussie Rules derived. As a result Irish people are quite familiar with Australia's national pastime. However to those people from any of the other 200 plus countries on this globe, AFL may come across as a tad confusing, to put things very mildly indeed.
About a month ago I acquired a ticket to the big rival game between Carlton and Essendon, held at Melbourne's iconic MCG. A large crowd of 78,000 were in attendance to witness a classic clash between two historic clubs with the game ending in a draw, something of a rarity in this sport. The atmosphere was hopping, and I personally enjoyed the experience a lot, allowing me to witness first hand how obsessive and passionate the people of Melbourne are about this game.
However it helped that I had a reasonable understanding of the basics of the sport. For somebody from the Netherlands, Mexico or Japan for example, the experience would more than likely be one of brain teasing confusion. The first time anybody sits down and watches this game it comes across as nothing but organised chaos. Basically it is a game played between two teams of 18 players, using an oval ball, on an enormous oval shaped cricket pitch. At each end there are four goal posts; two tall inner ones, with two smaller outer ones to accompany them. 6 points are awarded for booting the ball between the two middle posts, a score which is referred to as a goal. Should one be a little inaccurate, a "Behind" can still be scored as long as the ball goes between one of the inner posts and the outer post, to which a fairly useless consolation of 1 point is awarded. Players tend to tackle each other by doing whatever they see fit, and quite often there is about 10-12 players in a sort of make shift huddle trying to reclaim the football from underneath a sea of bodies. It sounds confusing enough right? You get the general idea so I won't go too much further into the rules . However if one gives it enough of an investment in time, it is not difficult to be won over by the drama, excitement and passion of "footy" as the locals like to call it.
Melbourne is the spiritual home of the game and boasts 9 of the 17 AFL teams (10 if you include nearby Geelong). The game is also extremely popular in South Australia, Western Australia, Tasmania and Northern Territory. However Queensland and New South Wales remain unconvinced and the natives of these two states are still very much Rugby League fans first and foremost. It is also worth noting that the AFL has the second largest average attendance for a league in world sport, behind only the NFL in the USA, and ahead of football leagues in Europe such as England's Premier League and Spain's La Liga. When living in Melbourne, there certainly is no getting away from the popularity of this game. It is just a shame it is not marketed to short term tourists more. Many backpackers from Europe who I have met over the last few months have never heard of AFL!
Yesterday provided me with another unique Australian experience, and that was the iconic Australian country/ folk singer John Williamson in concert with the Victoria Symphony Orchestra at the intimate Palms at Crown Casino. I am not exaggerating one bit when I say it was one of the best musical performances I have witnessed in the flesh. To put things into an Irish context, Mr Williamson would be the Australian equivalent of Christy Moore or Ronnie Drew. All his songs are written about his homeland, and range from emotional to entertaining and utterly ridiculous. For example, there is his legendary musical gag "Old Man Emu", a tune written about the glory of Australia's long necked large non-flying bird who he claims can "Run the pants off a Kangaroo". Then there is the unofficial national anthem of Australia "Waltzing Matilda", a song about a swagman camping in the loneliness of the Australian Bush, with his only companion being his swag (a waterproof bedroll for camping) which he deliriously named "Matilda". Listening to the lyrics of all these songs gave me a warm sense of pleasure that I am living in this wonderful country, with such a diverse landscape, friendly people, and unique, only-to-be-found-here, wildlife. The stories he told in between songs were no less entertaining, and I cannot recommend his music highly enough. A real Aussie experience that most foreigners will never witness, due to a lack of knowledge of this artist's existence. To cap things off nicely I got a quick photo (see below) with the man himself afterwards as he was signing copies of his recent albums.
However, there is one aspect of Melbourne which I do not like one bit, and that relates to the city's trams. Now there is nothing wrong with the actual trams themselves. They do a fairly decent job getting one around the city in an efficient manner, and I would actually go so far to say that Melbourne's transport system in general is in fact excellent. No the problem actually relates to the egotistical police cop like figures known officially as "Revenue Protection Officers", but to the general population as miserable tram inspectors.
These people basically scan the tram network "providing customer service", i.e. checking to ensure passengers hold a valid ticket for their journey. It is not so much what they do that is the problem, but in fact how they go about doing it. It is not unusual to see, at the one time, six inspectors hop onto an empty tram of no more than six or seven passengers, and approach customers in an arrogant manner in the hope of busting somebody. When such an event occurs, they all congregate around the offender, like sheep in an Irish field, all no doubt delighted that their ego-boosting journey has had some success. Quite often these officers will act in a condescending manner towards the people they have caught, who quite often genuinely forgot to validate a ticket that they had pre-purchased. Once they have caught somebody they make their exit from the vehicle, all together, and join the next tram simultaneously. Why six people are needed to monitor a tram of as many passengers is beyond anyone's comprehension. A pure sign that the recession has not hit the land down under with any sort of vigor.
Oh but it only gets worse. A fine for not holding a valid ticket on the Melbourne trams is a deflating $172. However should a passenger have his or her feet on any of the cheaply manufactured seats, then an identical fine is issued. Crazy I hear you say? Well it is about to get more shocking. A drink driving offense in Victoria is a mere $119. Yes, in this country, it is seen as a greater offence to add a few specs of dirt to a seat than it is to put somebody's life at risk. There is something seriously messed up about that, and I want answers to such lunacy!
I'll be back again with more stories. Until then, take it easy.
